3/20/13 by Aly

Dear roommates,
I'm sick of you only washing your dishes and leaving mine in the sink when Lord knows I wash yours every time I do the dishes. I am also sick of hearing you two fight at 3 am because your on the verge of a break up. I do not appreciate coming home to you completely re arranging my things without even telling me because you go on adderoll binges and completely disregard anyone else. I really wish you would not be drunk every night and fight. Stop moving my fucking food to all different shelves in the house before I start doing it to you OCD assholes. For as much as you run up the electricity I should be living on my own. It would cost me the same. Oh and I took over this lease because your old room mate moved out bc she couldnt stand you. Wonder why ?

3/17/13 by S

Apparently my bitch of a roommate signed up for a doggy rescuing club over break. I've been turning away all these people knocking at my door all day saying they're here to drop off all these foster german sheppards, mastiffs, and big ass dogs. Bitch never asked me or any other roommates. Did I mention we aren't even allowed to have dogs here and any stains come out of our pocket? WTF! This lease was the worst thing that ever happened to me, I HATE THIS SHIT!

3/1/13 by Fleance

My roommate is pretty much the most annoying, boring, introverted cunt on the planet.

She's privileged(like, when she's sick, her parents send her money so she can stay home from work for 5 days at a time), so she has no concept of barely scraping by or being independent, and she loves bringing up everything her parents do for her constantly. She also enjoys bitching about people using government assistance, because, ya know, everyone was born with rich white parents, so welfare is stupid, right? AmIright?

I sometimes need her to give me a ride home after work(I take the bus and sometimes get off when the buses stop running) and she bitches at me constantly, even though I pay her more than adequate gas fees(40 dollars, 40 friggin dollars a month when she gives me 4 rides a month o.o')

She's a slob and will leave her NASTY cheesey pasta dishes on the counters, without throwing the left overs away, so they grow mold and smell like a sickly death storm. She does NOTHING but watch TV all day, then, while watching the DUMBEST shows and movies(Bones, Dawson's Creek, Fullhouse, and The Covenant(imagine Twilight but with witches and even less of a storyline), and a myriad of other terrible films) will talk to me, while I'm trying to watch Anime with my headphones on, or play a game, about her stupid shows and movies DX Or she'll try to show me stupid facebook pictures when I'm clearly doing something(like studying C++ -.- yay interruptions)

She never feeds her cat or empties the litter box, I end up doing it constantly, she doesn't clean, she just watches TV. All day. All fuckin day.

She also likes Nickelback, I mean LOVES Nickelback, and tells me how awful my music is, because "its that shit no one has ever heard of." Oh, so because it's not some terrible mainstream SHIT with no musical talent and the shallowest lyrics("BUT THEY WRITE THEIR OWN LYRICS!"), it's shit. Right. Yeah.

She also hates Anime.

I don't know why I moved in with her ugly fat ass.

2/28/13 by Casper

My asshole roommate is 33 years old, has no job (because he sits inside all day long playing flash games!!), never cooks, has his mum send him food or orders take out, never cleans up, listens to music extremely loudly, drinks like a fish, smokes all the time and stinks up the whole house, and of course never pays anything on time. When i tell him to clean up he says he used to clean up when he moved in, but I messed it up, so he stoped. Because he is a borderline alcoholic and is almost constantly drunk, he wakes up in the middle of the night and pees all around the toilet but not in it. Then he told me it's not hygenic of me to sit on that toilet, but won't clean it up because i will mess it up later anyway... Also he goes in my room when i'm not around and steals my booze and then says ' i'll buy you some tomorrow '. Guess if he ever bought me any...

2/20/13 by gobucks

My roommate is the worst! She never helps clean up the room, leaving me to clean up her mess and mine. She constantly eats in her bed (one morning I woke up to see her sleeping on a Chipotle burrito wrapper and a bag of chips). When she eats, she chomps her food so loud and drives me nuts. She breathes so heavy,.. and I'm NOT the only one who notices that. Usually, she only leaves the room to go to class. She has food delivered, works out in the room, studies in the room... she needs to leave. She never goes home unless it's over a break. She drives me nuts!

2/11/13 by Denton

My roommate's a dirty, no filthy, ugly, lame, fat, WEIRD, unappreciative, selfish, sneaky bitch who lives in her own filth. What more is there to say?

1/29/13 by Salomé

Dearest Roommate,

I've been nice enough to compile a list of things I've always wanted to say to you, but won't/can't because you're extremely stupid and will try to physically fight me if I express myself. Here we go..
You're pathetic
You're a terrible mother
You're too insecure
You ruined/are ruining a marriage and your scarring your child and his children for life
You're a selfish bitch
When your kid cries your expected to tend to it, not ignore it and continue to play subway surfer and update your FB page, dummy bitch.
The ONLY reason guys sleep with you is because they can tell your easy. If you having your stretched out tits hanging out of your $5 clearance shirt doesn't scream "thirsty" idk what will.
You are a liar
Your children will despise you when they figure out who you are
You're 31 years old and the most unstable, mentally damaged, financially irresponsle person I know.
Go to the shrink, you need some serious, serious help
Screaming, cursing, resenting and beating your kids is a sure fire way to raise little fucks
Stop giving out advice, you suck at it.
I think most people would agree that being on your phone 24/7 is rude as hell and at time extremely inappropriate.
Being single and alone doesn't make you pathetic
Skipping from one boyfriend who may or may not be married, have herpes and be 10 years younger than you IS pathetic.
I'm fairly certain your "true" friends all think your the most worst person on the planet
You are SOOO weak!
Your "OCD" you self diagnosed is really just you being a CRAZY PERSON
I pray that I never ever ever ever ever ever come close to resembling you as a person or a parent
Your extremely rude and unapologetic.. great way to make friends, dumbass
You seem like you're an illterate asshole 90% of the time
I don't care if your kids are mixed, your white, don't say the n word.
You are very pretty, but your personaily is HIDEOUS.
You eat like you haven't ate in days, smashing food into that whole in your face is not lady like.
You look, dance and present yourself like your easy, and that's why your a 2 in the morning booty call, dudes don't wanna wife a hoe.
Your opinion is NOT the only one that matters, and in most cases doesn't at all.
I hope ALL of your mistakes catch up to you (yep, I hope you catch the herp)
Learn to take some responsibilty for your actions, it's not anyone else fault but your own.
Your baby daddy is married and not to you, get over it and stop trying to steal him. It hasn't worked for the last 3 years and it didn't work when you got knocked up so quit trying.
I never trust you or your opinions. Your a mess, you have no grounds to give advice.
Having your mommy bail you out of everything in secracy does not make you a "top notch bitch"
When Independent by Destinys Child comes you cannot raise your hands up at Bey
You a terrible terrible terrible friend. Like the worst. And your an even shittier roommate
Your narcissitic, and have no reason to be.
You resent your children, and it shows to everyone including them.
Quit crying about your life, ain't nobody wanna hear that.
You make the worst decisions soley based on what you want, selfish bitch think of your kids
If I was your parents I would be very ashamed of you.
You think your smart-your not.
You have no reason to be judgemental, your so fucked up.
I'm not sure you're fixable.
I hope you read this.

1/24/13 by Lynnifer

My friend of ten years asked me to move with her. I realized after a few weeks it wasn't going to work. I found out that she sells her body for money and weed. She brought her dog to the apartment and smokes heavily. The lease says no pets or smoking. She started persisting that I be a prostitute with her, that it what to do to get to the top. She said she was trying to get pregnant, which means she was not using protection. Her period was late and she thought she was pregnant. When I asked whose it was she laughed and said "a tricks." I started to get sick to my stomach. One day we were cleaning the house and I put dirty dish rags in the clothes the next day she posted on facebook I used them as a cumrag. Totally not true. So I let everyone know she was a whore then moved out. I am so over it, im glad I got out of that situation. I don't want that kind of rep.

1/20/13 by st olaf

I had a french roommate at st. Olaf in minnesota. Great, i thought. Cultured and new, to me, anyway. named christophe porot, he has 2 showers a week, barely changes his clothes and tells me how vapid i am for not living in the library. I get consistent a’s, but the prick tells me i’m ignorant for wanting to read a magazine in my down-time. besides, he has seriously taken advantage of girls left and right. I've witnessed him dragging one into his bed or rudely copping a feel after reading some french poetry (how romantic- fucking pig!) And he never got a single girl who wasn't absolutely shitfaced. also, he snores, goes through my things (i’ve actually caught him), is untrustworthy, and he also puts his dirty clothes in my laundry bag in the hopes i will wash his shit for him. rude, condescending, embarrassingly unhygienic and a disgraceful representation for his country. so glad i don't live with him anymore. Bon voyage, you piece of shit.

1/17/13 by Marilyn

Roommate,

You are a stupid slob. You are fat, you're a drunk, you don't clean. You sat up crying on the porch till three in the morning because you failed out of school so that you could train to serve at the cheesecake factory. You beg for attention when you are hammered, which is constantly. "Wont you come out and talk with me?" No! Why would I want to go out, into the cold, watch you chain smoke cigarettes and drunk-idly cry when I don't even like you! You smell. You're ugly. You wine constantly. You don't clean up after yourself. Yet you still expect me to coddle you. I'm not your mom bitch! Grow up and move out. I hate you.